【ღ A Day and Another Day ღ】

So what's happening?

1st Situation :

My Internal Final Assessment ended. Wow.
Nice. Finally done. But much more to go on since 11th March gonna have an exhibition at college.
and what's the result? I don't know. Many things need to be improve.

2nd Situation :

Packaging group work that I don't know anything about it. Wow.
I wonder why is it have to be group work?
It's much better to do it alone anyhow since group members are all dragging me down.
What more I can say? Doing things that never actually think what will it be after that.
No comment from me besides saying "well done".
So what actually happens?
Yeah, I m having final on the damn same date and it make me much more busier.
Well, I did everything I can to make the whole thing easier to be able to understand.
But wtf happen?
Path were all wrong direction.
I wonder they really do research or they were planning to left everything for me to do.
I did what I'm capable, trying my freaking best to explain while they said "Yeah, Understood."
But What came out?
Okay, so maybe I should say it's my fault that I din't do EVERYTHING for you all.
If you all expect so much.

3rd Situation :

Hanging out after everything at college settled.
Fetching everyone back after dinner and plan to have another round to celebrate friends' birthday after that but was a total fail. since it's just fucking damn stupid plan. no point to explain more about it.

Freaking bad mood, no where to release anger. Well, maybe here's the best place to release anyway.

RyoichiZB

【ღ Happy Valentine's Day ღ】

Suddenly felt like blogging today,
almost a month since the last time I blog.

Saint Valentine's Day,
commonly known as Valentine's Day,
or the Feast of Saint Valentine,
is observed on February 14 each year.

For me, it's just a working day.
Kinda tired of everything around.

Looks like my body might not be able to maintain any much longer.
It's like seriously incurable.
I might not be able to stand long. stay long, any more.

It's just weird that I'm a patient that does not seek for any doctor.
Yeah, I'm totally frightening about the result of the checkup.

I always wanted to tell myself that I'm strong.
Strong enough to endure everything.
But I failed to do so...

Sometimes I wonder why am I writing all these for...?
I don't know.

There's things that won't change no matter whatever happening,
so, just leave it as it...

RyoichiZB

【ღ Life Begining @ 2013 ღ】

Me, after bathing,

Looking at the blurred mirror...

drawing a smiley face...

As if I am smiling to myself...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So It was started on Wednesday,
After class,
I went to Sunway Pyramid to celebrate friend's birthday at Wong Kok

Yeah of coz, we went there because of the big size teh tarik.
Haha XD

And after everything ended,
I went to Midvalley and wait for my another friend to bring me to sungei wang area.
So we shop awhile at sungei wang then went to Pavillion and bought this.

Marimo!
Consider as our new pet~ haha~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 On the same day,
we saw this advertisement at facebook.
so we decided to try Nando's for the first time~

And then the second day, we went to Nando's at IOI Mall,
It's surprisingly tasty and it's can make us both full~
( p/s Both of us have really big appetite )

We ordered a set of whole chicken with 2 regular side dish and 2 bottomless Drink~
Totally worth it!

It's a very nice place, and I think I will go there again next time.
I think the next time I go would be a special day for me,
coz I saw the members' special stuffs.
and there's special offer for the anniversary that those that register their member on that day.
LOL

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next thing to do,
HOMEWORK!
Arghh..

Life goes on...

Saying 'Goodbye' to 2012 and 'Hello' to 2013

≈ A Synopsis ≈

Many things happen in 2012,

Quite a stress year...

was so happy on the first sem of this year at college.

but was so sad on the second and third.

I love, but was hated ; I was loved, but I hated.

It's like impossible to find someone special.

was trying my best not to think about it.

but, it was impossible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ Something to say about Myself ≈

Being such a straight forward guy doesn't bring any good to myself.

But at least I'm being honest to myself.

I lie if I had to but I hate to.

It's just doesn't felt like myself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ I'm... ≈

I'm not good enough for her...

Absolutely not enough, I know..

Excuses? Come on, it's fucking truth la...

It's a pain when I stalk.

It's a pain when I accidentally saw.

It's a pain when I miss.

It's a pain when I felt that I can't do anything for...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ Friends? ≈

Friends, I found out that I have few.

Not much, but at least there're able to understand me well...

At least they aren't like others...

Sometimes I really hate myself for being so different to different people.

it's like I had group my friends and there's zone where I treated them different.

Why can't I really just be the same to everyone?

The only reason that I found is, they are not able to understand my language.

Not much capable of understanding my words...

All my words is like a direct critical hit to them, while they do not understand the background.

I hate to explain much. I don't care even if they can't understand. 

Coz it just meant that we are from another world...

I "zone" every each part of friends list in my brain,

Yeah, it's just to let myself to be able to separate my language that will be use to communicate them.

It will also create a barrier that they will never ever be able to cross that zone...

Yeah, I know I'm bad.

But do any of you know I'm badly injured as well?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ Good Stuffs? ≈

Enough talking about bad things and actually there're some good things happen in 2012 too.. :)

≈ On 25th October 2012 ≈

~First Round~

So this is the first round of the day,
I went to Berjaya Times Square,
With College Colleague,
Watching 'Silent Hill',
and having a Meal @Old Town White Coffee

 Me~

All of us there..

~Second Round~

So after everything done at Berjaya Times Square,
I went to Wong Kok Char Chan Teng @SS2,
With Secondary Colleague,

 The 'Birthday Teh Tarik' @ Wong Kok Char Chan Teng

Me and Chek Ping

~Third Round~

Then after 2nd Round ended,
We went to Food Talk @ Kuchai Lama
This round just 4 of us,
which is Kenry, Chek Ping, Ashley and myself :)

the weird drinks there~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ Life as a Cosplayer ≈

So that was about my ordinary life...

Yeah, I do have one extraordinary one...

Cosplay life.

It brings me happiness and friends...

They are tons of people that are unable to understand the feeling of getting into this cycle.

And it's like singing to a cow if trying to explain to them...

So this is what I have done last year in 2012...

Event

~C2AGE 2012~

< DURARARA!! >

Orihara Izaya (me)

Shizuo (Alex)

~Comic Fiesta 2012~

< Fate/Stay Night >

Emiya Shirou

~Outdoor Photoshooting~

< Sengoku BASARA >

Uesugi Kenshin

Ichimaru Gin (me)

Halibel (Yuki)

Yeah, I'm definitely not a Professional Cosplayer...
Still a noobie... :c

Sorry if there's any mistake there in the character that I cosplay. >_<

Next plan?
U Guess! :p

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ It's 2013 ≈

And so 2012 has come to an end...
It's already January 2013

It's totally a new beginning and college life is gonna end very soon...
I hope I'm able to cope with my stresses...

~Target of this Year~
● Better Laptop ●
● Better Phone ●
● Filling up my Wardrobe ●
● Thicker Wallet ●
● Sleep more... lol ●

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

≈ An Unforgettable memory ≈

Anyway,
Today is 3rd January 2013,
2 years had passed since then...

My tears still fall and I wonder why?

I miss you... I really do...

I hope you are really resting peace up there...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To Be Continue...

RyoichiZB

拥抱情人节快乐？

今天是12月14日的拥抱情人节。
又过了一年了。
已经两年了。
突然想起了。

人生还真是累，
我……为什么会那么累？
应该说为什么要让自己那么累。

我坚强吗？
还是只是在逞强？

对自己重要的东西在别人眼中也许只不过是普通的东西吧？
没有人会照顾不是自己的东西吧？
反正也没有人会觉得是自己的错，
就当我倒霉好了。

算了吧。

刚刚才跟朋友们出去走走，
还以为可以让自己放松下来，
但却发现自己又再多了个面具。
面对不同的人就戴着不同的面具？
我就是这样？


RyoichiZB

一个人

一个人，没什么不好的。
少了很多烦人的事。

最近让自己变得很忙很忙，
明明累得要死了。

身体还撑得住吗？
“辛苦你了”

该烦的事太多，
可以不要那么烦吗？

现在这一刻，我只想一个人静一静。
我只想在只有自己的世界里活着。

我想休息，我想去旅行，我想离开这一切。
真的很累。

累到眼泪都流了。

没什么想写的，只是想发泄一下而已。

RyoichiZB

橙色情人节快乐？

我压力很大？

我自己也不知道自己正在做什么。
我很累。
我想一个人。
我想把自己关起来。
我想逃离到没有人认识我的地方。
我很讨厌现在的自己。

为什么我会这样？

今天是又每个月14日的情人节。
橙色情人节。
我又想起了几个月前的我……

我到底怎么了？

“你存在，我深深的脑海里~
我的梦里，我的心里，我的歌声里……”

~RyoichiZB~

我20岁了……

刚刚到家了，是朋友载我回的。
生日就这样过了。
我开心吗？
起码我装的很开心…

生日的一整天。

大概2点多睡，不知为何没什么心情。

今天一早到学院，我以为有上课，
所以带了一大堆东西去到学院准备上课…
哪里知道，class 取消了。因为是 term break.
没有人通知我……
反正我本来对他们而言就是透明的。
还好有带一点点东西做。
所以在学院做了一点点的功课。

约好跟班上的同学们去 TS 看戏，
庆祝我和另一个早我一天生日的人。
谢谢他们的心意，他们的蛋糕。

8点多第二round，去到 SS2 的旺角茶餐厅，
跟中学朋友们庆祝，虽然只是吃餐饭，
但谢谢他们记得我的生日。

12点多第三round，到 Kuchai Lama 喝茶，
喝下，聊下，玩下棋，回家。

大概就这样。

我不怎么开心。为什么？


RyoichiZB

Mistake?

难道每晚我都要掉泪吗？
为什么我那么的脆弱？
不需要特地避开吧……
讨厌我就承认啦……
反正我也习惯被人讨厌了。
他们到底在我后面说了几多的坏话，
我不知道。
信我还是信他们，就这样。

一切到底为什么会这样？
就是因为那天？但在那件事之前已经是这样了。

“她不会了解我的”我告诉自己
是啊，我串。
是啊，我多事。
我只不过爱上一个人。
但被讨厌罢了啊。
心很痛，总是希望着能被安慰。
但却不想告诉任何人。
我看着一切的开始，
一切的结束。
一开始如果她一切都不知道，
不知道我喜欢她，
那就好了，
那样的话，我们还是能说话，
还是能做普通朋友，
现在她就是那么的那么的讨厌我。

很快的我就需要负担起这个家。
我很害怕自己会失去依靠，
但我再也不能靠家了。

我到底怎么了。
有时，真的会想放弃一切就这样死掉算了。
我不行了。
假装快乐很辛苦。
真的很辛苦。


RyoichiZB

我没资格

我以为我能忘记那句话，
我以为我能忘记她，
但……没办法。

她的一句话，带给我一直到现在的伤。
无法形容。
我已经不是个有资格去找她的人了。
被讨厌了，还可以去找她的话，我真的很不要脸了。
看见她就会想起那句话，
我的心，很痛。
今天醒来前也梦见了那一天她说的话。
起身的时候，我的眼泪不知不觉就留了下来。
我还是第一次被人那么样说的。
明明就是很想很想去找她，
但我没资格。
我没资格爱她，
我没资格关心她，
我已经不再是个有资格靠近她的人了，
即使改变了，也没有用，
因为伤已留下疤。

爸爸的高血压，让我越来越担心。
以后就是靠我了？
我压力真的很大。
我不能向病了的爸爸拿学院需要的经费，
看来我要靠自己了。

自己的身体好像也不如以前了，
鼻血一天有时没流，有时流一两次。
一个星期大概7/8次。
我还怕是鼻窦癌，我不敢去看医生。
我很胆小吧……

RyoichiZB